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Crank’s News: BCCI moots RDRS

A simple concept involving Sachin to Review the Decision Review System

Mumbai: Seeking to put an end to the controversy over the Decision Review System (DRS), the  BCCI today mooted the idea of RDRS, a simple concept of Reviewing the Decision Review System to the satisfaction of all.

The BCCI said the new system is uncomplicated and does not give room for any fresh controversy.

As per this new rule, the Third Umpire, before handing out a verdict on any referral made to him, has to merely further refer it to the BCCI (over a hotline that may be opened specifically for this purpose). The Third Umpire will have to simply concur with what the BCCI says and judiciously pass it on to the on-field umpire.

Pointing out that it will be a win-win situation for all concerned, BCCI spokesperson Rajiv Shukla said ‘this new rule will ensure that the DRS will be in place for every series, as demanded by all the cricket boards. On the other hand, the misgivings of the BCCI would also be addressed adequately’.

If for some technical reason, the BCCI could not be reached for the review of the review, the Third Umpire can straightaway get in touch with Sachin Tendulkar. ‘Consistency is the key in these matters,’ the BCCI spokesperson said. ‘The technology may not be fool-proof as yet. But Tendulkar is,’ he added.

For easy understanding, the BCCI also released a handy chart to compare the existing set-up and the new system as suggested by it.

Current Method

Step 1: On-field umpire hands a decision.

Step 2: Batsman/Fielding team, unhappy with the verdict, seeks a review of the same, with a patented gesture of pushing all the fingers, including the middle one, ‘up’.

Step 3: The on-field umpire, in turn, signals for the Third Umpire to wake up.

Step 4: The Third Umpire, with the help of modern technology and precision gadgets, gets it wrong, or by sheer luck, gets its right.

Step 5: It doesn’t matter what the verdict is, a controversy is already on the interwebs.

Step 6: BCCI is blamed.

The new arrangement

Step 1 to 3: Repeat as above

Step 4: The Third Umpire to the BCCI (words to the effect): ‘Houston, we have a problem’. BCCI convenes an EGM and blames Lalit Modi.

Step 5 and 6: Repeat as above.

As you can see, there is no major shift in the process, except the fact there will be more fun and more time to waste for all, which if you get down it, is the essential purpose of cricket.

This novel idea may be put to use even as early as the forthcoming India-England series from next month. The new rule will be in place for all international cricket matches, even ones not involving India. ‘It’s puerile to suggest that the BCCI has no vested interest, I mean, no interest in matches other than India’s. BCCI can also be read as Board of Control for Cricket Internationally,’ Shukla quipped.

Meanwhile, the Pakistan Cricket Board, in an alternate solution to end the controversy over the DRS, said the best way out is to refer the referrals to the United Nations.

‘This is the most ideal solution, especially if we are to save the future of cricket, not to speak that of the UN,’ a PCB spokesperson said. The PCB clarified that referring the decisions to the UN will not slow down the game any more than when Steve Bucknor was adjudicating in the middle. Anyway, the UN will not give any decisions. It will merely deliberate on the matters while the game itself can proceed unhindered.

The PCB said the beauty of the new rule is that it would empower the spectators as they would be the ones who have to take the decision of whether the matter has to be referred to the UN or not. According to the new guidelines, if the spectators feel the decision arrived at by the umpires to be unsatisfactory, then they can immediately, in the general direction of where the UN headquarters is located, make finger-signals.  ‘A team of top UN officials will then closely monitor the developments and, continue to do so. Well, that is what they do always, nah,’ the PCB said.

Elsewhere, the ICC said there was no proposal to back the on-field umpires by arming them with more powers and authority and simply allow them to get on with the game.

‘To be sure, it will cut down on a lot of controversies. But it’s too radical a plan. The world cricket is not ready for such a revolution wherein the on-field umpire’s word is final’, the ICC said in a statement.

(Disclaimer:  Sorry. With BCCI and PCB we cannot say with certainty where reality stops and where spoof starts)


  • MN

    so surreal..
    .
    a while back i read PCB raised an issue with ICC asking it to take action against countries where government or politicians control the national cricket board – and when ICC made a directive to ban such boards & ostracize those nations, PCB raised a hue & cry (not to mention the law suit).. pretty funny stuff..
    .
    no wonder news channels & cricket are the greatest comic entertainment available..
    .
    MN

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